Out there

I know that you're out there. Perhaps I know you intimately, the color of your eyes when the winter sunlight catches the flecks of gold in them, or perhaps I have not ever seen your smile.  You're probably hiding in a book somewhere, wondering why I have not found you yet. Wondering what my mouth will look like when I'm laughing so much it makes my ribcage ache or if I like milk with my coffee in the morning. If my hands are always cold and need yours to hold them or if they'll get sweaty with anticipation when our fingers intertwine.

I don't care how much money you make. I don't mind that you use bar soap instead of body wash and that when meeting new people you always feel a little anxious and introverted. I care how much you'll make me laugh and how you'll always want to make sure I'm warm enough, that I'm full. I care that you'll think I'm beautiful when I cry but never ever want me to. I care what kind of person you'll be when I'm not around and that you smile at other people too just to make them smile. I care that you'll be my big spoon to my little dessert spoon and together we'll spend our days making each other smile. We'll write a story all our own that no one will believe could be real, that others could dream of in fairytales. I'll love you today and today and today and you'll love me more than yesterday but never as much as tomorrow. I'll love that you want a glass of wine when life get's too hard and you'll love that I get silent when I'm angry. I won't try to save you and you can't save me but somehow we'll save each other. Over every cup of tea, over every shuffle of autumn foliage we walk through, over the heavy boots the world gives us, and over the sky that never ends.  We'll keep it from falling in.